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  • macmeds, we don't take kindly to spammers 'round these parts. Now git, or sionnach may taunt you a second time.

    March 10, 2010

  • Come for the cheap relief of the morning after pill; stay for the Severe allergic reactions (rash; hives; itching; difficulty breathing; tightness in the chest; swelling of the mouth, face, lips, or tongue); chest pain; depression; lumps in the breast or under the armpits; partial or complete loss of vision or changes in vision; shortness of breath; slurred speech; sudden loss of coordination; sudden or severe headache; swelling of fingers or ankles; tenderness, pain, or swelling of the calf; weakness, numbness, or pain in the arms or legs; yellowing of the skin or eyes.

    Or choose among Acne; changes in menstrual flow, including breakthrough bleeding, spotting, or missed periods; dizziness; drowsiness; fever; headache; hot flashes; nausea; nervousness; pain; rash; sleeplessness; stomach pain; weakness; weight gain or loss.

    Maybe you'll be one of the lucky 1% to develop galactorrhea, melasma, chloasma, convulsions, changes in appetite, gastrointestinal disturbances, jaundice, genitourinary infections, vaginal cysts, dyspareunia, paresthesia, chest pain, pulmonary embolus, allergic reactions, anemia, drowsiness, syncope, dyspnea and asthma, tachycardia, fever, excessive sweating and body odor, dry skin, chills, increased libido, excessive thirst, hoarseness, pain at injection site, blood dyscrasia, rectal bleeding, changes in breast size, breast lumps or nipple bleeding, axillary swelling, breast cancer, prevention of lactation, sensation of pregnancy, lack of return to fertility, paralysis, facial palsy, scleroderma, osteoporosis, uterine hyperplasia, cervical cancer, varicose veins, dysmenorrhea, hirsutism, unexpected pregnancy, thrombophlebitis, deep vein thrombosis.

    Macmeds, may you develop all of the above and may the bowlegged teratogenic mutants that you spawn form a cult whose central tenet is the ritual disembowelling and cannibalism of the parent.

    March 9, 2010