Comments by qms

  • Surveying the legal terrain

    For linkage that will not enchain,

    Suppress your keen urge

    To partner or merge

    And choose a less binding verein.

    September 23, 2017

  • See epitomize.

    September 22, 2017

  • A nation thought noble and generous

    Looks threatening now and sinistrous.

    When governed by fear

    It's bound to appear

    No beacon of hope but facinorous.

    September 22, 2017

  • The farmer must fill up his days

    In trimming his crop so it pays.

    Folks stray in their walks

    Through maize in its stalks

    Enjoying the autumn mizmaze.

    September 21, 2017

  • A flea circus's basic equipage

    Is prone to some natural slippage,

    So dogs are kept by

    To replenish supply

    And muster the minimum kippage.

    September 20, 2017

  • Pale daybreak reveals a new mystery -

    Will ever we know the true history?

    The drinker's evasions

    On wounds and abrasions

    Amuse but are clear casuistry.

    September 19, 2017

  • Philosophers pursuing wisdom

    Are always at risk of simplism.

    Each elegant plan

    Will least govern man

    Achieving unique minarchism.

    September 18, 2017

  • Though long past her mouse-catching day

    She thinks current comforts her pay.

    This dizzy old cat

    Is a physiocrat,

    Convinced this is nature's true way.

    September 18, 2017

  • In waiting rooms outside the docs'

    The tv persistently squawks.

    Oh, please make it stop!

    It's crude agitprop -

    That 'news' they distribute at Fox!

    September 17, 2017

  • A wise soul takes pause and enjoys

    The balance of duties and joys.

    When harsh day is done

    Yet night not begun

    He savors the brief equipoise.

    September 16, 2017

  • Old Dante told so lurid a story

    Of suffering down in purgatory

    To make a good case

    That divine distaste

    Is stronger than objurgatory.

    September 15, 2017

  • See patrimony.

    September 15, 2017

  • To some he's a bad grammarian,

    To others a mad contrarian,

    But Ernest prefers

    Unfetttered words.

    He's truly a latitudinarian.

    Find out more about Ernest Bafflewit

    September 14, 2017

  • On such things do they ruminate in Oz.

    September 14, 2017

  • From far and near hear them all ululate

    As grievances endlessly pullulate.

    The deeds that offend

    They cannot amend

    But, oh, are they able to fulminate!

    September 12, 2017

  • The power of wishing is awesome

    For dreaming can solve ills or cause 'em

    Select your wish well

    You may have to dwell

    Within your own heterocosm.

    September 11, 2017

  • His phony compassionate pose'll

    Be seen as a feeble proposal,

    The work of a loser,

    A clumsy fake newser,

    A "leader" who's only a losel.

    September 10, 2017

  • To lustful dyspeptic King Henery

    Contemplative types were the enemy,

    So monks and their abbots

    Were chased out like rabbits

    And torches were put to each cenoby.

    September 9, 2017

  • Use language with careful facility.

    Let silence project as humility.

    Some, when laconic,

    Seem downright moronic,

    The artful are praised for pauciloquy.

    September 8, 2017

  • The busker has trodden in motley

    And crowds have applauded him hotly,

    So nurtured his claim

    To fortune and fame

    Arriving, he's sure, odd-come-shortly.

    September 7, 2017

  • The man seemed a comical crock to us,

    But Trumpland turned out to be populous.

    The boastful jamoke

    No longer's a joke -

    The goblin has won and he's nocuous.

    September 6, 2017

  • My tossing and turning has ceased -

    The sun has arrived in the East.

    In darkness I'm mopeful

    But dawn makes me hopeful

    I'll grind out a couplet at least.

    September 5, 2017

  • The romantic cities of mystery

    Arise by shores of distant sea.

    Remotest on earth

    They tell me is Perth,

    Excelling in terms of longinquity.

    September 4, 2017

  • The audio buttons on Word entry pages have never worked on my iPad, although they do sometimes work on my pc. I should have checked the OED, which includes the accent aigu. I see now that Wordnik does have an entry for corvée as well. Picky, picky. I wonder what the word sounds like in strine?

    Your teen will account you a jerk

    If you should oblige him to work.

    He'll face with dismay

    His domestic corvee.

    It's deep in his nature to shirk.

    September 4, 2017

  • Officials who use inside dope

    May slither the slippery slope:

    Abuse and perversion

    Or simply parergon

    To help a poor senator cope?

    September 3, 2017

  • Your teen will account you a jerk

    If you should oblige him to work.

    He will resent sorely

    His domestic corvee.

    It's deep in his nature to shirk.

    September 2, 2017

  • When light fades to dim crepuscule

    Take heart in a new opuscule.

    A limerick writ

    Means brains that are fit,

    That time's not yet claimed a new fool.

    September 1, 2017

  • To know if the land's right for grain

    Assess what the crops can attain.

    If rainfall's the limiter

    Then build a lysimeter

    To see what the soil will retain.

    August 31, 2017

  • It sways with the swells and the breeze

    Where rivers flow in to the seas,

    The seafarer's token

    The long journey's broken,

    The weathered but welcome balize.

    August 30, 2017

  • My lettuce and spinach so leafy grow

    I plucked 'em along with radicchio.

    With oniony zest

    And casually dressed

    They make an inviting pasticcio.

    August 29, 2017

  • When this age is done (and God speed!)

    What monument fits Donald's deed?

    A faint anaglyph

    Carved in some cliff

    In lowest relief fills the need.

    August 28, 2017

  • I face a confounding conundrum:

    On alternate days I become dumb.

    My lyre is unstrung,

    The songs I'd have sung

    Are sunk in cacophonous humstrum.

    August 27, 2017

  • Memorializing lost friends

    The clamor of laughter ascends:

    Let drinks that we quaff

    Be their cenotaph.

    Fond recall's a marker that mends.

    August 26, 2017

  • The restless afflicted with stray foot

    Are never persuaded to stay put.

    Their home is a plane,

    A tour boat or train,

    Their worldly goods packed in a bahut.

    August 25, 2017

  • I knew a most privileged cat.

    The throne where this prodigy sat

    Was lavishly built

    With silver and gilt,

    Upholstered in rare galuchat.

    August 24, 2017

  • See another version of the back-handed compliment in comments at facetely.

    August 23, 2017

  • How praise when the show fails completely?

    Why, smiling, just comment discreetly,

    "You've never been better!"

    It's true to the letter

    And solves your dilemma facetely.

    See another solution to this problem in comments at dabster.

    August 23, 2017

  • The peace of the house may require

    A deaf ear to what could transpire.

    A prudent necessity

    Is selective cecity -

    To act the benevolent liar.

    August 22, 2017

  • Thank you, bilby.

    August 22, 2017

  • With passage of years we should learn

    That night's not the time for concern.

    Lay worries aside

    For they will abide

    And await when the sky turns azurn.

    August 21, 2017

  • A skunk came last night and he stinked us.

    I count this event a distinct plus:

    There's little that's minus

    In clearing the sinus

    And giving the throat a swift linctus.

    August 20, 2017

  • Is there a reason that toped (see 11/1/2016 below) is unacceptable?

    August 19, 2017

  • ebriosity

    August 19, 2017

  • The worst are consumed with ferocity;

    Protections alarm by their paucity.

    It's tempting to yield-

    Abandon the field-

    And sink into deep ebriosity.

    August 19, 2017

  • Oh, thanks to the generous pigeon

    Contributing his humble smidgen!

    He's doing his part

    For out-of-doors art

    With dollops of fresh white badigeon.

    August 18, 2017

  • If you would imbibe and waddle not

    Give heed to the size of bottle bought.

    The short road to ruin

    Is steep and it's strewn

    With many an empty pottle-pot.

    August 17, 2017

  • When first the spring meadows are greening

    The cycle of life shows most meaning.

    See four-footed young

    Like flowers new sprung,

    The foal and the calf and the yeanling.

    August 17, 2017

  • When bound for the last destination

    I hope to create no sensation,

    Ask no trumpet blast

    To hear at the last

    But subtle and sweet avolation.

    August 16, 2017

  • See Lucullan.

    August 15, 2017

  • So jealous are chefs of their story

    They'll quibble at terms gustatory.

    Your balls in a pot

    Will still get as hot

    And you'll claim it's all to your glory.

    August 15, 2017

  • In higher class fry cooking vessels

    Each savory orb of meat nestles.

    What mere cooks will call

    The common meatball

    A master chef turns into cecils.

    August 15, 2017

  • A diplomat viewing disaster

    Might say that the artist's a dabster.

    Though bungling's averred

    The Janus-faced word

    Is heard as the praise of a master.

    August 14, 2017

  • A fox pup must study and train hard

    Or risk he's dismissed as a caynard.

    The skulk's tough tuition

    Achieves full fruition

    In raising a wily red Reynard.

    August 13, 2017

  • As talk for the troubled's a palliative

    And Congress, a failing collaborative,

    Inept to the hilt

    Is Babel rebuilt,

    It's frantic and futilely babblative.

    August 12, 2017

  • Don't fall for the cynical listicle

    Where news is typically mythical.

    The "ten things you must"

    Are hot air and dust,

    Just click-bait that's wickedly twistical.

    August 11, 2017

  • On tv at most he was B-list

    (Absent a C- or a D- list)

    But still self-assessed

    As clearly the best.

    The goblin's a true autotheist.

    August 10, 2017

  • Thank you kindly, ruzuzu. The challenge with such words is to rrsist the obvious "-ography" rhymes but after years of this I am running out of dodges.

    August 10, 2017

  • Potemkin knew ways to delude.

    His town was struck down and renewed

    Repeatedly, doggedly,

    A feat of sceneography,

    The man was a talented dude.

    August 9, 2017

  • They say the great pyramid had it,

    Though sheathing of marble once clad it:

    The way to the tomb

    (And curses of doom)

    Began with a well-hidden adit.

    August 8, 2017

  • He copied the language and tone

    The goblin prefers on the phone,

    But, lacking the bite

    Of soul-searing spite,

    The Mooch proved a pale epigone.

    August 7, 2017

  • torque, v. to offend, to arouse anger.

    Ex.: Police say that between four counties, Jack McPeak stole flags from fire departments, schools, cemeteries, “and the one that really torques me off,” said Keith County Sheriff Jeff Stevens, “the American Legion.”

    Google "really torques me" to find many such examples. Kitit, in comments at tork, reports that this expression was common when he was a teenager in the 1960s. I am about the same age as Kitit and I do not recall hearing this expression while growing up in New England. It may be a regionalism.

    August 7, 2017

  • See torque.

    August 7, 2017

  • Remember the fun that it used to be

    Reciting beloved Mother Goosery?

    Those memorable rhymes

    Limned foibles and crimes,

    So making mind shaping more lusory.

    August 6, 2017

  • The footwear that's always in vogue in

    The Maine woods is clearly the brogan.

    They'll withstand the suck

    Of voracious muck

    Awaiting in every pokelogan.

    August 5, 2017

  • In dark streets the living have flown

    A ghostly voice pleads all alone.

    The cry of that tranter,

    Ethereal chanter,

    Is that of sweet Molly Malone.

    August 4, 2017

  • My cat chases sunlight in pathces

    And bathes in the warmth that attaches.

    Devout thermophile,

    She'll squirm for a while

    Then nap in each one that she catches.

    August 3, 2017

  • An expression that deserves reanimation.

    August 2, 2017

  • The suitor who will stimulate her

    Will be a sureness simulator,

    Implacably stout

    And scornful of doubt:

    Prince Charming the Opiniator.

    August 2, 2017

  • The hot show in town is neocracy

    With wonders the people will flock to see:

    The kleptocrat's portion!

    The moral contortion!

    A circus of preening hypocrisy!

    August 1, 2017

  • Enmeshed by so grievous events

    The sharp pang of panic relents.

    Sour fate dully rubs

    And makes mulligrubs

    From fevers of old discontents.

    July 31, 2017

  • Oh, hear the poet's gushing tongue

    Sing sweet, although a lushington!

    In drink, aloud,

    He charms the crowd,

    Yet on the page is nothing done.

    July 30, 2017

  • In Summer sweet passions can occur:

    There's many a sensual plan astir,

    So fruits of the season

    And wine beyond reason

    Fill young lover's hopeful hanaper.

    July 29, 2017

  • It's strange what comes to be beauteous:

    If renal disease put its root in us

    The optimist's eye

    Will ceaselessly try

    To spy the elusively luteous.

    July 28, 2017

  • sprung rhythm is rather elastic

    With changes from small to the drastic,

    So words you thought odd

    Can be even trod

    Though looking imparisyllabic.

    July 27, 2017

  • Cornelius tended to hurry.

    His gait on most days was a scurry,

    His costume, unkempt,

    A failing attempt

    To shape something more than a lurry.

    July 26, 2017

  • Put trust in no helmet or brassard

    For life is a game played at hazard,

    So fate's subtle arts

    Will find softer parts

    And kick your incompetent ass hard.

    July 25, 2017

  • The throwing of veggies is rude -

    A terrible waste of the food

    But I find good cause with

    The faux golden jawsmith

    Provoking a food throwing mood.

    July 24, 2017

  • A basement's decidedly plain

    And will for the many remain,

    But go win the Lotto

    And build you a grotto,

    An oenophile's cave or souterrain.

    July 23, 2017

  • When Ernest paces and frets all alone

    He prays for a call on the phone.

    To garner a word,

    Remotest preferred,

    He'll find the brachistochrone.

    Find out more about Ernest Bafflewit

    July 23, 2017

  • We've made luxurious sport

    Of fingers reputedly short

    We'd be less elated

    To learn they're falcated,

    A brevity of ominous sort.

    July 21, 2017

  • A rhymer grown weary and stressed

    Does work that's not always the best.

    He needs a sabbatical

    In some sweet habitacle -

    A rhymless and rhythm-free rest.

    July 21, 2017

  • This house was once classy, by gosh,

    The walls with proud details awash.

    Some long-ago master

    Of decorative plaster

    Had spun out a web of guilloche.

    July 19, 2017

  • It matters not pale-faced or black

    In cities or furthest outback:

    The Aussies converse

    In patterns perverse;

    It's tall tales and endless borak.

    July 18, 2017

  • Beware lest like Eve you should meet

    A serpent who lies for a treat.

    That wily old snake meant

    To purvey a fakement

    For sheer love of simple deceit.

    July 17, 2017

  • From what I read you had to eat leaves and stems too, but I suspect wine was the point. The customers came eagerly and left happy.

    July 16, 2017

  • When rich folk felt clogged and unfree

    They'd travel to mountains or sea,

    Or make an escape tour

    Including a grape-cure

    To purge them of turgid ennui.

    July 16, 2017

  • A small-minded leader is fractious,

    One shriveled in heart is disastrous,

    But heaven forfend

    Our fate should depend

    On one who is brachydactylous.

    July 15, 2017

  • Your dress and gesture bespoke your role

    And safest in those days was a prole

    To retain your head

    For a cap of bright red

    While dancing a mad carmagnole.

    July 14, 2017

  • A cave man might woo her with banter

    Or show shiny stones to enchant her,

    If wise she'll require

    That he light a fire

    Before she'll bed down in his antre.

    July 13, 2017

  • A lawyer can put on a show

    Of precedents, row upon row.

    It beggars belief

    To call it a "brief,"

    So name it instead "bordereau."

    July 12, 2017

  • A mystery cult needs a team

    To manage how origins seem

    And stem any schism

    Like euhemerism

    That threatens to spoil the dream.

    July 11, 2017

  • A marketeer hungry for fame

    Will give common practice a name.

    A vocalization

    Like glocalization

    Refreshes the same weary game.

    July 10, 2017

  • He's more than a chip off the block;

    This cave man is cock of the walk.

    Not Dad's eolith

    But rad neolith

    Is what he can knock from a rock.

    July 9, 2017

  • I am not a polyglot hero.

    My knowledge of Spanish is zero.

    I'd rather write "pasture"

    Than risk a disaster

    In rhyming with agostadero.

    July 8, 2017

  • At meetings of Lexical Nation

    A collation precedes some potation.

    There's never a chance

    They simply will "dance;"

    The evening ends in tripudiation.

    July 7, 2017

  • Though beef was but rarely a fisc fit

    On Paddy's Day they'd always risk it.

    The immigrant tide

    Took pleasure and pride

    In platters of cabbage and brisket.

    July 6, 2017

  • There's many a prez who'd flirt a bit

    High office bestows that perquisite

    But impulse erupts

    And power corrupts

    So never entrust a jerk with it.

    July 5, 2017

  • His brief part should have been droll,

    A gesture, a flourish, a girandole.

    But clownish excess

    From too much success

    Has trapped us now in the Grand Guignol.

    July 4, 2017

  • The pirates taxed beyond endurage

    They taxed for sailing and for moorage

    And charged every boat

    In that city afloat

    Ridiculous fees for the murage.

    July 3, 2017

  • A little word trips, hampers, attacks us.

    Resist; adopt a disciplined practice.


    Never will blight us,

    Defended by sharp paralaxis.

    July 2, 2017

  • It starts as a union placental,

    Persists as invisible tendril,

    But twins, so they say,

    May dwell far away

    And share in a way extramental.

    July 1, 2017

  • At yoga camp life's a bit lazier

    To mimic the graces of Asia.

    At breatharian camp

    The signature stamp

    Is general alarmed aerophagia.

    June 30, 2017

  • The folks in a mystical cult

    Sip potions to help them exult.

    The visions adepts see

    Provoke nympholepsy,

    Which is the desired result.

    June 29, 2017

  • The scheme of the vegan is gentle

    With quinoa and kale and the lentil.

    Are benefits real

    As followers feel,

    Or is its appeal nutrimental?

    June 28, 2017

  • The Word of the Day limerick for July 27, 2017 is meant to be read in the context of the comment posted at logothete on September 4, 2014.

    June 27, 2017

  • The warhorse was no longer fleet

    So had to be shrewd and discreet.

    Where stronger words failed

    Old Teddy assailed

    His foe with the slur, logothete.

    June 27, 2017

  • See porte cochère.

    June 27, 2017

  • At Daisy Mae's regular onfall

    The hollow resounds to her bonk call:

    "Come old men and young

    The wee and well-hung

    It don't matter none. I want y'all!"

    June 26, 2017

  • All night fans in frenzy gave tongue -

    Gargantuan efforts of lung!

    Despite boastful songs

    The team failed its throngs,

    Who slouched sadly homeward, head-hung.

    June 25, 2017

  • Some think that the Donald's an odd man,

    But others, a sweet-natured Lord's man.

    I must give the nod

    To the party of odd;

    His piety reeks of the fraudsman.

    June 24, 2017

  • While "nut job" and "loon" are dismissive

    Yet "mad" and "insane" echo fictive.

    The language amazes

    With terms for our crazes;

    It's supple and locodescriptive.

    June 23, 2017

  • ruzuzu and bilby combine

    Lamenting my poor withered vine,

    But if there's an ointment

    For cruel disappointment

    That comforting unction is mine.

    For limericks are careless of clime

    And ripen regardless of time.

    Their happiest chore

    Is spreading of spore

    To generate offspring in rhyme.

    June 23, 2017

  • The pattern is hard to ignore:

    Buy local and you are a locavore;

    If seeking cheap eats

    In veggies and meats

    You're frugal and known as a frugivore.

    June 22, 2017

  • Expressions of disapprobation

    Have many a nasty mutation:

    The cold look that lingers,

    The wagging of fingers,

    But worst is the endless jobation.

    June 21, 2017

  • A poet who's really astute

    Is neither obscure nor too cute.

    His work ought to dart

    Straight to the heart

    Not needing a shrewd hermeneut.

    June 20, 2017

  • See goodman.

    June 20, 2017

  • Meditation is surely our true call,

    Let light that's inside us imbue all

    The mists that conceal

    Resolve and congeal

    And peace will descend like the dewfall.

    June 19, 2017

  • As patience and rhyming time passes

    The evidence clearly amasses:

    If not quite deplorable

    At least it's ignorable.

    A word we don't need is ekphrasis.

    June 18, 2017

  • The Scots wanted all done in triplicate

    But folks became testy and sick of it.

    Now red tape's reduced,

    Contentment produced

    By banning the pesky testificate.

    June 17, 2017

  • spinach

    June 17, 2017

  • Now scholars, I read, have once more

    Uncovered a case of fakelore.

    That beckoning moon,

    That quaint demilune,

    Was carved in no true outhouse door.


    June 16, 2017

  • Alas, bonnie lassie, why weep?

    Our dearest loves we cannot keep.

    I see you're begrutten

    But eat up your mutton,

    The gift of your favorite sheep.

    June 15, 2017

  • His face was of a type privileged

    To be by the great bard ripe-imaged

    It's sagging and sallow,

    Twixt mucus and tallow,

    Immortalized now as tripe-visaged.

    N. B.: So far as I can tell this word has been used in earnest precisely once. All other instances are quotation of that passage in Henry IV, Part 2.

    June 14, 2017

  • May God in his mercy deliver us

    From beasts that are wild and carnivorous,

    From shoal-ridden shores

    And humorless bores,

    And all things that tend toward mortiferous.

    June 13, 2017

  • Bravo!

    June 13, 2017

  • Some years ago I was traveling with family through the Loire Valley and we passed through the town of Tours. In the central part of the city there is an ancient tower (French “tour”). It was plain that if we had stopped to be guided through that remnant we would be taking the Tours tour tour.

    June 12, 2017

  • See comments at sparkle.

    June 12, 2017

  • Sparkle, sparkle, puny orb;

    Will I your mys'try e'er absorb,

    Lording over everything

    Like a rock star trailing bling?

    -by Quentin M. Sullivan

    See comments at scintillate.

    June 12, 2017

  • A tiger might flex a fierce fascicle

    And show you dentition carnassial.

    Would he likely munch on

    Your haunch for a luncheon?

    I think you can bet your sweet ass he will.

    June 12, 2017

  • Mortality's sentence is eating her

    But panic will doom her the speedier.

    She seizes in terror

    On all forms of error

    Including the fatal inedia.

    See also breatharian and comments at autotroph and photovore.

    June 11, 2017

  • I used to have a carbuncle. He was wonderfully helpful with "normally aspirated" car engines but became an anachronism when fuel injection came in. He works on lawn mowers now.

    June 10, 2017

  • If fibbers are guilty of fibbery

    Then sybarites wallow in sybary.

    A scribe who is given

    To squibs hasty scriven

    Is lost in the thickets of squibbery.

    June 10, 2017

  • Ecologists warn us that fish

    Are not a sustainable dish.

    Enlightened philosophy

    Eschews ichthyophagy,

    Or so would the scientists wish.

    June 9, 2017

  • So what's with the dogs' shaggy story

    And why do the pooches grab glory?

    If she's left unhindered

    My cat is long winded

    And, much like a mutt, is ambagitory.

    June 8, 2017

  • If ruzuzu could drink what she'd druther

    It'd be some astringent or other.

    A natural quirk,

    Genetics at work

    In one who calls vinegar "mother."

    June 7, 2017

  • The hot shots are flying pellmell

    And groundlings aren't able to tell:

    Was that trick more nimble than

    A flamboyant Immelmann

    Or more of a normal chandelle?

    June 7, 2017

  • ไข่เยี่ยวม้า (khai yiao ma), literally "horse piss eggs," is the Thai term for what are more commonly called "hundred year old eggs." These are hard boiled eggs pickled to a deep brown. Supposedy the old Thai recipe used horse urine as the pickling agent.

    June 7, 2017

  • His mem'ry is still a bit foggy

    (These days he often wakes groggy).

    He gropes for those truths

    He found in the booze

    Last night in his bright mystagogy.

    June 6, 2017

  • We learn from the lesson of Gideon,

    Who vanquished the army of Midian,

    Success takes invention

    And not close attention

    To rules in some stale enchiridion.

    Judges 7:17–22

    June 5, 2017

  • I try hard to rhyme up to spec

    But sometimes I put out pure dreck.

    It is most convenient

    My readers are lenient

    And bilby will not wring my neck.

    June 4, 2017

  • His antics are having effects bizarre.

    Take note of the nerve-shattered wrecks we are!

    The truth, be it told:

    He's hungry for gold

    And driven by deep pleonexia.

    June 4, 2017

  • No posting by this time is strange,

    Exceeding by far normal range.

    Yet here must we languish,

    Wordless in anguish.

    The Word of the Day does not change.

    June 4, 2017

  • Cruel mockers beware, woe betide!

    For Ernest's no safe man to chide.

    He knows words with edges,

    So legend alleges.

    His sharp tongue may baffle but gride.

    Find out more about Ernest Bafflewit

    June 3, 2017

  • The oenophile's delicate senses

    Take shelter from vulgar pretenses.

    No plonk's to be found

    Within his surround,

    Defended by strong piquette fences.

    June 2, 2017

  • Puzzling how, in spite of everything, Australians enjoy such a reputation for friendliness. Perhaps bilby’s ill humor is the result of frustration with the Australian dung beetle problem. It seems the place is covered in shit.

    June 1, 2017

  • Their tastes are demanding for sure:

    From sniffing to careful morsure

    Dung beetles commit

    To freshness in shit

    And none but the finest ordure.

    June 1, 2017

  • Be sweet at the start and intenerate

    And hope that your arguments penetrate.

    If the blockhead's unmoved

    By good sense, though proved,

    Then seize him and quickly defenestrate,

    May 31, 2017

  • To raise your verse above the babble

    Start out with the simplest dabble.

    Begin with June/moon

    And find very soon

    Your voice become fluent and habile.

    May 30, 2017

  • "Delicious" is marketing hype

    While "mac" marks a plain-spoken type.

    It seems to me "codlin,"

    Is rather too maudlin

    For fruit that you coax to be ripe.

    May 29, 2017

  • The wedding once done, a race ensues

    Involving the lusty kilted youths.

    The new-minted missus

    Will dole out some kisses

    To he who comes first in the broose.

    According to the OED the vowel in broose is one of those peculiarly Scottish stranglings. Think of the sound made by an expiring bagpipe as it dwindles to a flaccid state. I have elected to rhyme it as you see. Those who want perfect authenticity should abuse the rhyming words into conformity.

    May 28, 2017

  • When bored to the end of your rope

    Try a toy that will help you to cope:

    Watch atoms decay

    In their frivolous way

    In the lens of a spinthariscope.

    May 27, 2017

  • The Yucatan narrates the birth

    Of changes for old Mother Earth.

    The pastoral scene

    Hides a vast astrobeme,

    The secret to dinosaur dearth.

    For a description of the Chicxulub crater and its relation to the Cretaceous–Paleogene extinction event, see

    May 26, 2017

  • Thank you, hh.

    May 26, 2017

  • A Kalenjin youth's preparation

    For manhood involves separation

    From infantile joys,

    And foreskins of boys,

    And comfort as harsh depuration.

    The Kalenjin people of Kenya dominate marathon running worldwide. For a treatment of the role of coming of age traditions in fostering this dominance see:

    May 25, 2017

  • The Wordie affliction's a curse;

    Indifference, however, is worse.

    How blessed the infection

    That raises objection

    And moves gentle bilby to verse.

    May 24, 2017

  • Our grief seeks surcease and a remedy,

    A passage from pain to serenity,

    And such is the meaning

    Of inchoate keening

    Or intricate weave of a threnody.

    May 24, 2017

  • The voter is bored with me-tooism,

    Impatient with faux folksy truism.

    He longs for much more

    Like great days of yore

    When orators mastered euphuism.

    May 23, 2017

  • It's fine if the state is initial

    When infancy's cute and official,

    But helpless and squalling,

    Is sad and appalling

    When old folk are worn to altricial.

    May 22, 2017

  • I know how the vampirish sort doth:

    Their fashion is always to sport goth.

    Their trademarks are fangs

    And ebony bangs

    And capes that are sewn out of mortcloth.

    May 21, 2017

  • Cult members once loved how he talked

    But now for his gaffes he's bemocked.

    His status, once clerical,

    Is changed to chimerical.

    The high priest of con is defrocked.

    May 20, 2017

  • tristero, you must be a cat lover. Penelope (my aged cat) and I rejoice in your approval.

    May 19, 2017

  • My cat for the most part's indolent

    And curled in sleep seeming innocent,

    But fidgets will twitch her

    From dreams that bewitch her

    Betraying ambitions sanguinolent.

    May 19, 2017

  • Consider the choices you have

    Selecting a soup of the slav.

    There's bigos, quite thick,

    Or pick one that's quick

    And dine on a fresh bowl of schav.

    May 18, 2017

  • Sounds a lot like “okaley dokaley,” the favorite expression of assent of Ned Flanders, Homer Simpson’s pious neighbor. Could this be evidence of the influence of Dutch folk tradition on The Simpsons? There might be a PhD dissertation there.

    May 17, 2017

  • My friend, alas, made up her mind

    To credit some claims of dafter kind.

    So reason's traduced,

    It's trumped and seduced

    By visions supplied the purblind.

    May 17, 2017

  • Said Bach to his bold interlocutor,

    "It seems, sir, you are a provocateur.

    While true, it's been said

    I'm matchless in bed,

    I'm also an unmatched hymnographer."

    May 16, 2017

  • See comments at tetric.

    May 15, 2017

  • I see that some GNU collaborator (or perhaps an imperious spell checker), in plundering The Century Dictionary and Cyclopedia for a definition of "tetric " has assumed the old and honorable "froward" to be a misspelling of "forward" and has "corrected" it.

    Obscurity makes one a coward

    Another finds language empowered:

    It's timid and horrid

    To substitute forward

    From distrust of stubborn old froward.

    May 15, 2017

  • The fare at the fair is eclectic:

    You might spy a clown with a pet trick,

    See shows of all styles

    For thrills and for smiles

    And nary a visage that's tetric.

    May 15, 2017

  • The votes had been willy nilly cast

    Electing our materfamilias.

    Electoral flunkies

    (Those mischievous monkeys)

    Appointed instead a male silly ass.

    May 14, 2017

  • Perfumed were the notes Melissa sent

    With sweet and enticing kiss of scent,

    Beguiled was my ear

    When lips were more near

    To hear her soft whispers mellisonant.

    May 13, 2017

  • *deep bows and blushes*

    May 13, 2017

  • An oracle who's on the decline

    Is desperate to peddle a sign.

    She must sell a bodement

    To pay her abode rent

    And maintain her practice divine.

    May 12, 2017

  • A brewmaster's post is a sinecure

    In abstinent towns such as Srinagar,

    But still they are tickled

    With veggies well pickled

    So happy with Gallagher's vinegar.

    May 12, 2017

  • Or, in the case of impatient lovers, you might see a pronghorn ant elope.

    May 12, 2017

  • The ale that is brewed by one Gallagher

    Is never a champion challenger.

    The judge always fails it.

    I don't know what ails it

    But, my! It's a fine batch of alegar.

    May 11, 2017

  • Since The Century Dictionary and Cyclopedia was last published in 1914 I think the most Mr. Foreman can claim for his 2005 contribution is a novel coinage made in ignorance that the word already had a definition.

    May 10, 2017

  • Romanians mostly are gracious,

    With smiles on their welcoming faces,

    But should it transpire

    You've met a vampire

    Then count on him turning mordacious.

    May 10, 2017

  • Zuzu, your praise is a perfect balm.

    May 9, 2017

  • The dumb beasts can't voice their complaint

    That men are more psycho than saint,

    So must remain stoic

    In this psychozoic,

    But contented neighbors they ain't.

    May 9, 2017

  • Success is often a toss of fate

    For politicians who oscillate.

    Observers may savor

    A fortunate waver

    As willingness to patrocinate.

    May 8, 2017

  • There's worship of differing quality

    From reverence to outright frivolity

    The champ of bizarre,

    The oddest by far,

    Is Hollywood tinsel astrolatry

    May 7, 2017

  • In Latin he'll punish, by Jove,

    Those schoolboys whose silly minds rove.

    Hell get their attention

    With endless declension

    And looks that are classically torve.

    May 6, 2017

  • Erect he's the humble number eight

    But, privileged to help out the great,

    And supple and nimble,

    Reclines as a symbol,

    So toppled becomes the lemniscate.

    May 5, 2017

  • His fitness for office eludes us.

    He seems like one of The Stooges.

    His character's wriggly

    Yet he projects bigly,

    So failings are shown loud and hugeous.

    May 4, 2017

  • If shipwrecked on a desert strand

    Exploit the things you find on hand.

    It takes but a brio jiff

    To make up a neoglyph

    By spelling out "Help!" in the sand.

    May 3, 2017

  • Assessing the speed of fast yachts

    You'll estimate headway in knots.

    A crew that's not bashful

    Will keep the craft rap-full;

    The knots that they make will be lots.

    May 2, 2017

  • At softball we played plenty bad

    So heed my sad jeremiad:

    Though students of lit

    May prosper at wit

    They're bad at forming an ennead.

    May 1, 2017

  • Most insults are quickly construed

    But Scots are inventively rude.

    I find it off-putting -

    The Brit as pock-pudding -

    From folks who treat haggis as food.

    April 30, 2017

  • A blender is most efficacious

    At rendering foodstuff pultaceous

    You'll whip up a doozy

    Of banana smoothy

    With yogurt and fruit that's musaceous.

    April 29, 2017

  • The college ideal's medieval.

    Though all crave relations "collegial,"

    Now academe's groves

    Are turned profit troves

    Are blasted to barren pedregal.

    April 28, 2017

  • There is going to have to be a Trentrance before there is a Trexit. Turkey is not a member of the EU.

    April 27, 2017

  • As youths they were doubtless robustious

    But proved to be smart and industrious.

    The twig's not ill bent

    By youthful ferment;

    The pack are become quite illustrious.

    April 27, 2017

  • When Ernest is off on word chases

    His appetite's often voracious.

    For convenience' sake

    He'll blend up a shake

    And suck down his suppers pultaceous.

    Find out more about Ernest Bafflewit

    April 26, 2017

  • What a great name for a plant! I saw “crybaby tree” on the Recently Loved Words list and had to check it out. The most succinct explanation I found is;

    The plant you are asking about is Erythrina crista-galli. A native of Brazil, it will actually grow into a tree during periods of mild winters. Otherwise, it does tend to be more shrubby (though large) when frozen back to the ground regularly. The common name "crybaby" comes from the formation of drops of nectar which drip from the flowers like tear drops. This is a great hummingbird plant, as the tiny, nectar feeding birds find the red flowers irresistible.

    To be found at:

    I want one.

    April 25, 2017

  • The master must make his objective

    Instruction that's clear and effective.

    The best way to train

    Is with a quick cane

    For young'uns are quite nociceptive.

    April 25, 2017

  • The kings that the Nile gods anoint

    Had tombs that were flat-topped but quaint

    Long gone now, mastaba,

    Near far-off Aqaba

    As pyramids made more a point.

    April 24, 2017

  • The addict is wrapped in the dire hug

    Of mania felt as a higher tug.

    For twitchers it's birds,

    For others it's words

    Or smoke and bright flame for the firebug.

    April 23, 2017

  • This leaves me scratching my head. An "engineer hoist with his own petard" (from Hamlet) is a bomb-layer blown up by his own device. How is this without foundation? It seems to me a fruitful metaphor. In fact, the “See also” list at the end of this expression’s Wikipedia entry is full of possibilities:

    Own goal

    Poetic justice


    List of inventors killed by their own inventions

    April 22, 2017

  • The Polish eat more than just ham.

    They breakfast on pancakes and jam.

    They garnish with sea moss

    Their big bowls of bigos,

    But mostly their kitchens make spam.

    April 22, 2017

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